Too much to do, aka where to focus
There's always too much to do. I perpetually feel that way.
Even with the most sophisticated productivity system in the world, there's more to do than I have the time or will to get it done. Change-the-world ambitions are no match for twenty-four-hour days. Short days always win.
The more productive you are, the more you realize that there is too much to do. It's never ending.
Do the most important things, and cut everything else.
Without your mother, and without both of you, I'd sit in a chair overwhelmed by everything I could be doing, at the expense of doing the most important things. Your mother has taught me to slow down and find joy in small things, walks in particular. That's one of the reasons I love photography. It brings me into the present, finding joy and beauty in everyday life. And as soon as you both came along, I was forced to focus on the most important things — the highest leverage things that will multiply in impact when done. The big things.
Growing up I saw my dad and Karen start and run a string of businesses. The majority failed. But they had two that did well for them, and our lives all changed because of it (and they saved most of their money!). I admired the agency they gave themselves. There was nothing glamorous about their businesses. For years their office was in a small business park, a large rectangular box with small drywalled offices in the front, a large open warehouse in the back, and their private working space overlooking the warehouse. But it was theirs.
My dad always said that he couldn't work for anyone else. I thought that about myself. Maybe it's why I was determined to start my own business.
And I did. Many days I found myself unsure of where to focus my time and effort. More so, I found the work unimportant. To focus, I needed prioritization, purpose, and vision.
When Sierra was born, I found it.
I've wasted a lot of time in my life. I've had a few chapters in my adult life: basketball, music, school, self-employment, kids. Basketball and music were times of low productivity.
Everything changed when I had a vision for who I was. Which started with a vision of who I wasn't, who I didn't want to be. I didn't want to be a struggling musician. Struggle was likely but not inevitable. I didn't make music with broad appeal. I made music that I liked. I needed to change.
I prioritized health and school. I was transformed in a year by focusing on the three spheres of my life. It wasn't a lightning strike where everything changed, but small steps, trial and error, and discovery.
- Vision: what do I want my life to be?
- Purpose: why is it important to achieve that life?
- Prioritization: what can I do now to get closer to my vision?
I regularly feel lazy and unproductive. It's a condition of perpetual underwhelm, always expecting more of myself.
But when I look back on how far we have come, I'm overcome with gratitude and appreciation. Having you kids has changed my life, and I focus on becoming a better person, a better father, and provide for you.
There's always too much to do. Focus on the things that really matter. And if you're not sure what to do or how to focus, the most important thing to focus on is what to focus on: your vision and your purpose. Who do you want to become?